
1) This week saw me sustain what must be the first cheese-related injury in history. No joke! I took the dog to dog-training and cut my thumb open on a piece of Manchego! You may ask what I was doing thumbing about with a piece of Manchego in dog-training, well: you have to take “highly salient” treats and I didn’t have anything particularly suitable. The trainer suggested tiny bits of cheese. Yes I KNOW they’re not supposed to have cheese, and I never give it, but it was an emergency situation. And given that this dog regularly has things in his poo that I can’t even fathom, I couldn’t really see how one piece of cheese could kill him. At any rate, cheese never made it to dog because the bloody stuff was so hard I couldn’t break it up! And then the rind shot down beneath my nail and cut my thumb and then there was blood.
Incidentally, the training went very well, thank you very much – Mr AMR did all of the proper work, I just handed slithers of chicken and stood there like a lemon, sucking my bloody thumb.

2) From one cheese to another… SMELL MY CHEESE! KISS MY FACE! AHA! Yes, I’m talking about Alan Partridge and, in particular, the fact that last Sunday I did actually kiss his face. Steve Coogan’s, if I’m being accurate, but he very kindly indulged me and slipped into “Alan” mode when I asked him to. What a sport. He probably gets asked “to be Alan” all the time, so: thank you Steve. You made my day. I have ticked one of my lifetime achievements from my to-do list! (Sad, but actually true.)












